Nov 30

“Your place is closer.”

“No it’s not.”

“As the crow flies.” She stared at him till he added, “In opposites land.”

Nov 30

She threw it back. It made a satisfyingly biscuity noise as it bounced off his forehead.

Nov 29

608.

Nov 28

“I went to see a patient in a prison and there was a riot. I’m fine. Just managed to get my nose broken.”

“And,” she studied him closely, “you’re holding your stomach because your nose hurts?”

“I might have been shot as well.”

Nov 28

Without thought he began to catalogue his symptoms, estimating the time it would take him to bleed out. It didn’t always pay to be a doctor, he thought fuzzily as the room faded away.

Nov 27

607.

Nov 26

Floppy did not take kindly to these things, and proceeded to let everyone know though the universal language of biting.

Nov 26

“You have that Look. You know, the one that says ‘There’s no point to life anymore, I’m going to conveniently find a big group of Death Eaters and go down fighting.’”

“I actually hadn’t gone that in-depth,” Sirius said, but didn’t deny it.

Nov 25

606.

Nov 24

Everyone had agreed that the idea of Tim on ice skates while wielding a hockey stick was enough to strike terror into the hearts of teenagers everywhere. As such, he had been forbidden to play. Tim of course, saw it as a form of tyrannical oppression and had on several occasions, threatened to overthrow them. In-between these bursts of rebellion, however, he tended to sulk.

Nov 24

“My parents really hated me. My bath toys were a radio and a toaster oven.”

Nov 23

605.

Nov 22

The Doctor looked through his wallet, attempting to find some currency of the era; two shekels from Ancient Egypt, a lump of mineral that won’t be discovered on Earth for another 500 years, and finally, a scrunched up 5 pound note.

Nov 22

He sniffs affectedly. “This is your fault,” he accuses her. “I was never this vain before you left that mirror with the glowy lights behind.”

Nov 21

604.

Nov 20

“Thought this was Mum’s number.”

“Leo Jones, I am very much not your mother.”

Nov 20

“No, he’s…tied up.”

“…you mean that literally, don’t you.”

“Little furry things with spears. They want to sacrifice him in my honour.”

“I’d say I’m surprised but I’m really, really not.”

“Right, well, it’d be nice to chat and everything, but—”

“—you’re a little busy. Got it. Tell him I called when he’s recovered his dignity, will you?”

Nov 19

603.

Nov 18

“Oh, marvellous. You’re going to kill me. What a finely tuned response to the situation.”

Nov 18

His car was neatly parked in his parking space, as if to mock him. He circled it, prodded it, got in, got out. It remained stubbornly normal.

Nov 17

602.

Nov 16

“So you have, then, no idea who we are? Or what our aims are?”

“Not a sausage,” the Doctor replied cheerfully.

Nov 16

The man made a strange gesture at the vidscreen. A gesture that, unbeknownst to the Earth-dwellers surrounding him, was considered quite rude in the Sbnar System, Northumberland from the years 4567 through 4569, and on a planet called Gallifrey.

Nov 15

601.

Nov 14

Not that he was actually guilty, mind, but try explaining the finer points of law to a surly, and armed, rhinoceros.

Nov 14

“High priority surgery? How high a priority?”

Bryant chuckled. “Let’s just say if it was between him and the president as to which one I was taking, the president would get Rodriguez.”

Nov 13

600.

Nov 12

Then she came down with poison ivy and so did the son of the bank president, in places where a clothed person wouldn’t get poison ivy.

Nov 12

“If I could just get something for the pain? It’s rather a lot of pain, actually. If you would, perhaps I could just be knocked unconscious.”

Nov 11

599.

Nov 10

“Portents?” That sounds unpleasantly biblical. “What kind of portents? It rained frogs? What kind of frogs?”

“I don’t know.” She sound exasperated. “Do I look like a frogologist? Green slimy ones.”

Nov 10

“I think I’m all right…On the other hand, I may collapse. I’ll let you know when I’ve decided.”

Nov 9

598.

Nov 8

“Ninety-nine percent of this job is research, Rebecca. It’s only when there’s no other choice that we go into physical battle.”

“What your uncle is trying to say is that our lives are weeks of mind-numbing boredom punctuated by seconds of sheer terror.”

Nov 8

“Z-Y-F-F-E-R-L doesn’t spell anything.”

“Yes, it does. It spells ‘zyfferl’. I thought everyone knew that.”

“It’s not a word. Use it in a sentence, then.”

“‘The zyfferl was used in a purely ceremonial fashion during the last of the Kvyetvahnic Peregrinations of the Scarlet Junction, owing to the depletion of stores at the hands of the Sontaran Battle Fleet after the Siege of Ruth’ven Aanerthougsi’ix’pajhet in the Pansil System.”

Nov 7

597.

Nov 6

“You appear to have sprung a leak, sir. You’re smearing blood all over my ship, and I don’t appreciate it.”

Nov 6

“Uh, I think you doth misquoted,” Jon remarked casually, then held up his hands when the tip of the sword was placed at the hollow of his throat, “Of course, if that’s the way you want to say it, who am I to argue?”

Nov 5

596.

Nov 4

“Lots of people don’t like me. I worry about the ones with guns, not the ones with pens.”

Nov 4

Kelly snaps, the indignant fury in her voice only heightened by the angry slap of rain against pavement. It’s like she’s enlisted the universe at large to team up with her in her angry tirades against him now.

Nov 3

595.

Nov 2

“He isn’t sexually frustrated!” I told her desperately. “He’s just the normal kind of frustrated! Because we frustrate each other!”

“Yes, yes,” Victoria said with a dismissive wave of her hand. “Sexually.”

“Platonically!” I yelped.

“Oh, please,” she said, rolling her eyes. “There’s no such thing as platonic frustration.”

“Oh, really?” I asked, getting a bit irrational. “Then perhaps I should be worried about what’s going on between the two of us right now!”

“Oh, Auriga,” Victoria sighed, in the same voice she used with her less gifted students, “Don’t attempt to convert to lesbianism just so you can escape from your feelings for him.”

Nov 2

“How do you know your plan is better? You don’t even know what my idea is.”

“Does your idea involve nudity?”

Nov 1

594.