Oct 31

He yawned and shook his head, wishing for a good, stiff gin and tonic. Preferably without the tonic.

Oct 31

17.

Oct 31

“You can’t tell me that you enjoy the New York skyline more than Gotham. I’ve been there it’s too square. Not enough darkness.”

Oct 30

Nothing like a good fist in the eye to make a man that much more inclined to take a midday nap. And Jonathan needed very little encouragement to do that in any case.

Oct 30

16.

Oct 30

“Dude, you’d better tell him what he wants to know because it’s after midnight and he eats human flesh after midnight.”

Oct 29

Never before had two people ignored each other with such dedication and focus.

Oct 29

15.

Oct 29

“Oh, and I’m probably going to have to punch Roy. Just so you know.”
“Oh ... that would be too bad.”
“Why did that sound like sarcasm?”
“Oh, well that would be because it was.”

Oct 28

“For your information, Mister O’Connell, I am not hung over.”
No, in fact I always see double. Makes life more interesting. So there.

Oct 28

14.

Oct 28

"And that is the Batcomputer. Do not touch it. No, that is the DNA spectorgraph. Do not touch it. On the table to the left is the electron microscope. Do not touch that either. The hydrogen generator is through that metal door. Do not even touch the door. The gymnasium and weight room are around the corner, to the right. You may use the equipment in there. Practice starts at five sharp."

Oct 27

“Yes, but you didn’t wake anyone up from the dead, did you?”

“Nobody’s perfect.”

Oct 27

13.

Oct 27

“I don’t have to know all the details of how he got hurt to know the fact that he’s actually taking care of an injury for a change means that some doctor somewhere called him an idiot. Probably loudly. And repeatedly.”

Oct 26

"I know that you'd like a dog, but it's just too hard. You'd have to look after him. That's a lot of work I don't think you're ready for."
"I used to help look after three elephants, four tigers, six dogs, two gorillas and a monkey."

Oct 26

12.

Oct 26

“Actually. It was locked up. But anyone who knows how to break into a building would know to come in through the skylight.” Rick said with a straight face.
Evy glanced up at her husband, not even questioning if that was how he came in. She knew it was.

Oct 25

"You saved my life."

"Had to. It's my birthday next week."

Bruce's eyebrow arched as he started the car. "So?"

"So, you give good presents."

"I found the magazine you left on my desk. The red Harley. The fact that it was circled, with a note saying 'This one' was a dead giveaway."

"Subtlety was never a strength for me, you know that."

Oct 25

11.

Oct 25

“Now maybe next time, you’ll actually listen to me, huh?”

“Don’t bet on it.”

Oct 24

“Well, it ain’t working now,” George commented, with the astute observations that only George could accomplish.

Oct 24

10.

Oct 24

"You can't win, Nightwing. I'm bigger, stronger, and I've defeated Batman in the past."

"Well, I'm smaller, faster, and better looking than Batman could ever be."

Oct 23

“And just what would life be like if we told you every little scheme we hatched?”

“A lot less scary.”

Oct 23

9.

Oct 23

Superman thought hard. “Hmm, I don’t know. I like pancakes.”

“That’s in one of Batman’s files,” Robin answered, unimpressed.

Oct 22

The hotel cleaning staff didn’t like it when he left weapons out. He’d already scared the wits out of two maids.

Oct 22

8.

Oct 22

Robin wanted to tear out his hair and scream. This is what drove Bruce nuts, he realized. That constant...niceness. It made you want to, well, tear your hair out.

Oct 21

“Rick, sweetheart, why don’t we put the gun down and make a cup of tea for our guests?”

“Oh, yes, let’s make a cup of tea for the intruders!”

Oct 21

7.

Oct 21

“Mara, honey?” Clark started innocently. “Do you feel like telling Auntie Lois how many explosives you’d use to blow up this safe under my desk?”

The girl put down her orange crayon, and wandered over. She looked at the small off-white painted box closely.

“‘Pends on which gauge of steel. C4’s real good, and don’t need lots, ‘cause ya get it in that crack there, and it busts the weld. Kablewy, real good.”

She looked up, smiling anxiously for approval.

Oct 20

A blaring police siren interrupted them. A pasty young man jerked upright, dropping is bottle.
“AIR RAID!” he screamed.

“Turn off the lights!” The tea cup lady leaned over the balcony railing, pointing wildly at the light bulb overhead.
Someone in the crowd produced a pistol, and did a very admirable job of shooting out the lights.

Oct 20

6.

Oct 20

"I'm not in shock!" the kid said harshly. "When I'm in shock, I'll let you know I'm in shock!"

Oct 19

“I promised Agent A that I would bring you in tonight for a good meal, a long bath, and some much needed sleep. If I fail in my mission he will undoubtedly make my life utterly miserable. I could really use your help here. You’re a bit too big for me to drag home....”

Oct 19

5.

Oct 19

“Faster than a speeding bullet--Superman, Jr. escaped from the sure grasp of the cowardly kidnappers!”

“‘Cowardly’ kidnappers?” Jack protested. “Twitchy, you’re talking about us!”

“More powerful than a locomotive—Superman, Jr. knocked out the two bumbling bandits first by leaping over the bed in a single bound, spinning in midair, and kicking out, connecting with the gang leader’s eye. And then, by doing a—uh, what did he do next, Jack?”

“He did five handsprings, and landed feet first in your soft gut!”

“Aw, Jack, that’s not nice. There’s no need to poke fun at my weight. You know that I’ve been dieting—”

“All right!” Jack cried. “I’m sorry! Okay?! It’s not fair! No one—no one told me that the kid could do—that stuff.”

“And, thus Superman, Jr. foiled the vile kidnappers’ dastardly plans, making the world safe for, uh, kids again!”

Jack put his head in his hands. “Why me?”

Oct 18

“When Ms. Harley Quinn attempted to help her ‘puddin’ as I believe she called him, Master Dick, did what he referred to as a ‘Flying Grayson Lizard Wizard Move’ on her and knocked her out cold.”

Oct 18

4.

Oct 18

“You were sentenced to death! I got life, the jury liked me better.”

Oct 17

“Three grave robbers, two purse snatchers who beat up little old ladies and…”

“And a partridge in a pear tree.”

Oct 17

3.

Oct 17

“I tell you this, the moment that I get back to the office I’m going to be on the phone with Bruce Wayne, personally. We’re going to have a heart to heart. By the time I get through, there won’t even be a position in an executive bathroom for this Bozo!”

“Why wait? I have my phone right here,” Dick reached in his pocket and pulled out his Wayne Tech Digital phone handing it to Conrad.

Taken aback Conrad stared at the phone, then admitted, “Unfortunately I... I don’t have the number on me at this time.”

“Oh that’s ok,” Dick piped up. He was getting that same warm fuzzy feeling he had as Nightwing, just before he nailed the ‘normal’ slime on the streets of Blüdhaven. “Just press two.”

Dick would have paid to have the reaction on the man’s face recorded. “No wait. He won’t be at the office this late. Try three, that’s the house. And if Alfred answers, tell him I should be home just in time for dinner tomorrow.”

Oct 16

“May I borrow your inter-dimensional transportation device?”

Oct 16

2.

Oct 16

He was stumped for a second. Then he thought of what Bruce would say. Then said the opposite.

Oct 15

“You should avoid such entanglements in the future.”

“What are you, a freakin’ fortune cookie?”

Oct 15

1.

Oct 15

"In fact, I shouldn't even be here. I can't begin to tell you how many laws I'm breaking."

"Sixteen." Bruce said.

She'd only thought it was twelve, but she had no doubt Bruce was right.